I have realized the talk with my eldest son is not the same talk that I will be having with my youngest son. The truth has not changed, but the world they live in has. As many of you know, transgenderism has become a part of our national dialog and is moving directly into the educational curriculum in America. The conversation on the playgrounds and in our neighborhoods about the birds and the bees is changing. How should we as parents respond? Continue reading
You may have heard a counselee or friend say, “I just need to get this off my chest!” or “I need to talk to someone or I am going to explode!” These sentiments are common as people struggle and find some relief in expressing their pain. Without a doubt, a compassionate Christian should be ready to listen to another struggling believer. No one can provide help without having a loving, listening attitude. However, we should consider moving from offering mere emotional relief through passive listening to providing actual help through loving instruction. There are some biblical reasons why merely venting is not enough and is even harmful. Consider three important truths to teach your counselee who believes that getting help is equivalent to finding someone to listen to their venting. Continue reading
“Must we argue again?” Many women say they don’t want to keep arguing with their spouse or child. Yet they continue arguing! So must you argue? The answer: no. But it almost seems the mouth goes on auto-pilot. Yet God’s Word is clear that the words of our mouth really come from the heart (Luke 6:45). When…
Words: What do your words really say? After a fight with a loved one, don’t you feel bad? Perhaps you blew up. Maybe you gave the silent treatment. Either way, your hurtful words or your lack of any words but for your nonverbal communication – a slammed door, crossed arms, gritted teeth – speaks too.…
Biblical counseling allows for very honest conversations to be fostered in a safe, truthful, gracious, and raw environment.
And as much as we enjoy the sentiments of that first sentence, many say, “I no longer have those conversations – I have stopped talking to God and I’m certainly not going to share with others. In fact, these conversations bring fear and despair. I’ve stopped talking.” Continue reading
We all do it, multiple times a day. Sometimes we’re right. Many times, we’re wrong. It can damage spiritual growth or relationships that have taken years to build. What am I talking about?
Assumptions. Continue reading
I have many hurting relationships in mind. I am picturing grown men bawling buckets of tears while angry voices echo in my head. This is my life weekly. Thankfully, I am also remembering stabilized relationships even after adultery, and men and women learning to control their volume rather than using their voices as a weapon to cut or bash one another. What makes the difference? Continue reading
Our biblical counseling center provides training for those interested in learning how to provide intensive biblical discipleship counseling. In one module, our students are taught the nuts and bolts of how to conduct a biblical counseling session. They learn that we begin a counseling session by gathering data and getting information from the counselee. Before we can give any counsel, we must know the issues the counselee wants or needs to address (Proverbs 18:13, 15, 17). Our counselees often bring the respectable problem out first. They want to know if we are trustworthy and knowledgeable before they bring the real problem to the table. The respectable problem and the “real” problem are not always one and the same! Continue reading